There are a lot of messages in NARC. While it's billed as an anti-drug video game, its true message is closer to suggesting that wanton violence is okay just as long as it's against somebody who does illegal drugs. It's a game that sends the message that everybody that does drugs is a low-life loser who hangs out in the slums always looking for their next fix. It sends the message that all drugs are funneled through one guy who is so fat from his products that he doesn't even have a body any more. But these are not the messages I take from NARC. Instead I am reminded of the license plate of the cart that greets you at the welcome screen. That license plate reads: "Just Say No." That's a good idea, it's definitely for the best that you just say no to NARC.

I have always been a little confused at who NARC is aimed at. The game tries to send the right message, but it's far too violent to be taken serious. Yet, I can't imagine it appeals to a lot of the ultra-violence lovers because of its annoying heavy-handed message. It's just a mess. I can only figure that the game's popularity was borne out of novelty of the arcade game. This NES port tries its hardest to capture that magic, but all we get is one of the biggest disasters of the 8-bit era.


Let's start with the basics. NARC is a game where you play one of two police officers tasked with taking down the drug lords. In order to do this you need to either arrest each of the druggies or, more likely, blow them up into a million little pieces. The choice is yours. It's all about you walking through linear levels blowing up potheads, arresting the dealers and destroying the facilities where everything is manufactured. Together with your partner you hit up every possible drug cliche Midway could think of.

Look, there's absolutely no reason for any suspense in this review. NARC on the Nintendo Entertainment System is a train wreck. We already knew this game was going to be like shoving your hand in a wood chipper, we just didn't know how far down the arm we needed to go. It turns out that you might as well shove your whole body in there, because you're guaranteed to have more fun with that than playing NARC.

For starters, the game is rendered practically unplayable by the horrible flickers and slow downs. It's not bad enough that the game's graphics took a major hit, you can't see your main character half the time. And let's not forget about the repeating backgrounds. I wasn't impressed with the two color building the first time I saw it, why do you think I would like it the 200th time? Even if you could get around the game's ugly 8-bit graphics, you would still need to figure out how to play through the constant graphical glitches.


And then there's the control. The arcade game was designed for more than two buttons, so the developers had to get a little creative when programming this console port. Depending on how long you hold down the two face buttons, that will decide what kind of weapon you shoot and whether you jump or crouch. Making things even more unbearable, the D-pad movements are stiff and the game never feels natural. To be fair, the original arcade release didn't feel completely natural, either. But it's night and day when compared to this 8-bit turd.

At its core NARC is nothing more than a shooter with a mildly offensive theme (and some racist imagery). The game throws a crazy amount of similar looking grunts at you, all while you blow them up in the most violent way possible. Actually, the violence in this NES game is toned down, so it's not really the most violent way possible.

NARC has never been a good game. The arcade game was mean spirited and heavy handed, the NES port is a regrettable experience and the 2005 reboot was the final nail in the coffin. This game feels like it's trying to send a moral message, but it's hard to preach morals when all you're doing is blowing people up. Looking to NARC for a good message is like asking Charles Manson for dating advice. This game is absolutely terrible, easily one of the worst games I have ever played on the Nintendo Entertainment System.