Fighting the Questions of E3!


Maybe this will be the year Brad Pitt finally puts down that guitar and learns how to play the keyboard!
This is the week we've all been waiting for. This is the week of E3. The week when the biggest video game companies get together to announce their newest games, show off amazing new hardware and bash the competition. At long last we'll finally get answers, play the big games of 2010 and maybe even get a little closure. And it all happens this week!

Here at Defunct Games we're excited for this week and can't wait to find out the answers to all of our burning questions. Unfortunately we're a little impatient. We can't wait a few hours to find out about the big announcements. To help us answer some of our lingering questions we've decided to bring in some professional help. Because this segment has been such a big hit (and a great predictor of E3 trends), we are proud to bring you another informative episode of Fight the Future!

Today we've managed to bring together our very best panel of psychic experts. We start with the returning champ, John Lennon (via the John Lennon AI Project). Next to him we have a pile of expensive fortune cookies to eat. And rounding out this panel is Tony Hayward, the bumbling dolt of a Chief Executive at BP. Either his mind is elsewhere or he doesn't know much about E3, either way he didn't have much to say when we talked to him. Find out the answers to all of your questions when we beginning Fighting the Questions of E3.

John Lennon
Fortune Cookie
Tony Hayward
John
Lennon
Fortune
Cookie
Tony
Hayward
Is Sony planning a PSN subscription service?
"I think so, but I'm not sure."
"Those grapes you cannot taste are always sour."
"No, I wouldn't say that."
Will Nintendo announce a new Legend of Zelda game for 2010?
"Mmm Zelda. I think so."
"The gambler and the fisherman both have beginner's luck."
"It's tiny in relation to the total water volume."
Is this the year Microsoft announces a portable Xbox?
"So who are you kidding?"
"Happiness is next to you."
"There aren't any plumes."
Will Sony announce a brand new PlayStation Portable?
"I can't say for sure right now. Maybe later."
"You will outdistance all your competitors."
"No one understands why it's failed."
Will we be shredding the slopes in SSX5 this year?
"Does it really matter?"
"The best is yet to come."
"We're committed to fixing this problem."
Is there going to be an ICO/Shadow of the Colossus combo pack?
"I don't know about that, mate."
"Accept what comes to you each day."
"Almost nothing has escaped."
Will Square Enix shock the world with Final Fantasy XV?
"Anything could happen, right?"
"The pleasure of what we enjoy is lost by wanting more."
"I am sure they are genuinely ill."
Is this the year Nintendo finally reboots Kid Icarus?
"I'm not sure."
"Hope is like food, you will starve without it."
"None of that is true."
Will the Sony Move outdo the Microsoft Kinect?
"Do you mean you and me? If all those squares can ..."
"Nothing in the world is accomplished without passion."
"The Gulf of Mexico is a very big ocean."
Can we expect nothing but casual games for Sony and Microsoft's motion controls?
"Sure, I suppose it could happen."
"You'll advance for with your abilities."
"What the hell did we do to deserve this?"
Will a Mario game ship with the Nintendo 3DS?
"Good chance."
"You are a person of strong sense of duty."
"I assure you, it's not that bad."
Will Rockstar announce a brand new Grand Theft Auto game?
"It could happen."
"Live each day well and wisely."
"I have not heard that, no."
Will Harmonix announce another really big band (e.g. Pink Floyd, Led Zeppelin, etc.)?
"I'd like to see Led Zeppelin, yeah."
"It's better to be the hammer than the anvil."
"The environmental impact is likely to be very, very modest."
Does Nintendo plan on supporting the Virtual Console?
"I can't tell if Nintendo plans on supporting the Virtual Console."
"If everybody is a worm, you should be a glow worm."
"There is no substance to it."
Is an Xbox 360 redesign inevitable?
"I'm speechless."
"Take the chance while you still have the choice."
"I may have misspoken."
Is 2010 the year for Duke Nukem Forever?
"What a stupid question, mate."
"You should be able to make money and hold on to it."
"We'll be there to the very end."
Any chance of Mother coming to the U.S.?
"I really couldn't say for sure."
"You are never selfish with your advice/help."
"The oil is on the surface."
Does Rare still make games for Microsoft?
"You never can tell, you know."
"The possibility of a career change is near."
"You know, food poisoning is surely a big issue."
Will Sony offer PlayStation 2 games in the PSN store?
"Does it really matter?"
"Working hard will make you live a happy life."
"We've been in contact, that's true."
Does Konami have what it takes to release Rock Revolution 2?
"What's Rock Revolution 2?"
"Judge not according to the appearance."
"There's no one who wants this over more than I do."
Will that Street Fighter iPhone game hit the PSP?
"It could happen on iPhone."
"Integrity is the essence of everything successful."
"The situation has been overblown."
When is somebody going to make The Godfather III: The Game?
"When?"
"Life is too short to hold grudges."
"We have too many people who work to save the world."
Will somebody figure out how to solve the BP oil crisis while at this year's E3?
"Probably not."
"Never quit!"
"I'd like my life back."

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