There's something very frightening about this commercial for the Punisher, something even scarier than the Punisher's deathly aura. Most people that look at this commercial instantly notice Frank Castle's big guns, stupid costume, and camel toe, but that's not what I see; when I look at this commercial I see the Punisher doing a punishing comedy routine in front of some unsuspecting audience. I can hear him now, "why did the chicken cross the road? To shove this metal rod up that guy's ass sideways! What, you've heard this one before?"

Unfortunately the comedy styling of Frank Castle is not the only scary thing about this advertisement. Perhaps the scariest part of LJN's commercial is just how, well, un-scary they make the Punisher look. Oh sure he's giving you his "I'm gonna getcha" look, but look at the spray paint around him ... you think quotes like "Super Arcade Action" and "He Who Lives ... Wins" are going to give you a lot of street cred? I don't care how many guns you're holding, you're never going to look tough when you're standing in front of graffiti that says "the NES game." Seriously Frank, how tough could this neighborhood be if THAT is the graffiti you choose to stand in front of.

But let's get back to that comment, "He Who Lives ... Wins." What the heck does that mean? I suppose that's true if you're in a horror movie, or even a war zone ... but when it's next to "the NES game" it just reminds me that there are a lot of losers that are still alive. Osama bin Laden is still alive, oh; maybe that's not a good example. Now that would be a game, let's send the Punisher after Osama, might save the audience from the terrible stand-up routine he's performing. "You know it's bad when instead of tomatoes the audience decides to throw bombs, wacka wacka wacka!" That's enough Frank, that's enough.

FROM: Who Shot Bad Advertising? (Part Two)