Hey, do you smell something? No seriously, what is that terrible odor? Oh, I see, somebody thought it would be a good idea to take their shoes off and put them in this advertisement. Well let me tell you, that is not a very good idea! Your dirty shoes and used socks are disgusting; all its doing is making me want to flip to another page so that I won't have to deal with the terrible stench. But then again, considering how bad this commercial (and game) is perhaps that horrible smell fits in perfectly.
So this is Track Meet, a simple name for a simple game. "Blow their socks off," it says. And how do they intend to hype you up for your race? Apparently they want to get you excited by explaining in vivid detail just what is going on. "You're in the blocks. The coliseum crowd is hushed. The starter gun cracks. You're off!" Um ... yeah, that's not very exciting. But wait, there's more. "You take the lead! You're maneuvering perfectly. You just might beat your smile-flashing opponent Jack Strop, and go on to product endorsement stardom." Uggh. Is this an advertisement for a video game or an excerpt from the world's lamest children's book?
But you know what is truly offensive about this commercial? It's not the narration or the smelly shoes. Nope, it's that blasted cover of Track Meet! Take a look at the character on the front cover, he may look like an athlete, but he's not. How do I know? Because his shoes are untied! There's just no way a real track meet athlete would be running a race (with hurdles even) with their shoes untied. I'm sorry Interplay, but you fail. Or maybe this untied shoes thing is actually a metaphor. Maybe this guy is telling us that he doesn't care about winning, just like we shouldn't care about this game. And you know what? I don't care about this game ... or this terrible advertisement. Goodness, I feel like I'm the one that lost the race!