Can you survive An Unholy Return: The 31 Games of Halloween?
33 Consoles of Christmas
Nintendo GameCube (2001)
By Cyril Lachel     |   Posted on December 17, 2006   |   Episode 25 (Show Archive)  

It's time once again for Defunct Games' 33 Consoles of Christmas, your 33 part guide to the best and worst system designs of all time. Join Cyril Lachel and Chad Reinhardt as they judge 33 different game consoles based on what they think of the look. Forget about actual hardware and software, the only thing these guys care about is talking about their exterior design. Join us every day between November 23 and December 25 for a new console review!

Synopsis: After dealing with the troubles associated with the Nintendo 64, Big N decided to switch over to DVDs (albeit mini DVDs) and give the hardware market another attempt. The GameCube launched with a lot of promised but was quickly overshadowed by the Microsoft Xbox and its flagship game, Halo. Despite Nintendo having a strong first party line up, the GameCube failed to garner much love from much needed third parties. For years the GameCube languished in third place, even with the releases of games like Zelda, Mario and an amazing 3D Metroid game. Thankfully the system was cheap enough and there were enough amazing first party games (and Resident Evil 4) to warrant a purchase, but now that the Wii is available it's harder to justify the $80 investment.

Best Games: Resident Evil 4, The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker, Eternal Darkness: Sanity's Requiem, Super Smash Bros. Melee, and Metroid Prime.

Video game consoles have never had great names. The name PlayStation is pretty stupid, so is TurboGrafx-16 and Neo Geo. And what exactly is a Dreamcast anyway? But the GameCube managed to take its stupid name and turn it into something that makes complete sense. The GameCube is exactly what it says it is, it's a game playing cube. It's also indestructible. It has a large handle on the back that makes me think that it was meant for kids to pack around (and drunken adults to use it in bar fights). You could drop the system off a large water tower and it would still work fine. Cockroaches will be playing the GameCube after everybody else has died from a nuclear war. I personally kind of like the look of the system, even if I'm afraid to admit it. But see, that's the problem. This is one system that manages to look like a kid's toy. For years critics have complained that Nintendo systems are for kids, and it's this kind of look that fuels the fire. It almost seems unnatural to play a game like Resident Evil 4 on a system that has a large handle on the back. To me this console could have been named the GameLunchbox and nobody would have questioned it.

It's a cube ... and it plays games. There's really little to be left to one's imagination in regard to what the GameCube is, what it does, and what it looks like. It's absolutely tiny, especially when compared to its bitter rivals from the Sony and Microsoft camps. The handle on the back is a nice feature in theory, but I seldom skip down the street swinging my GameCube like a lunch pail the way Miyamoto does, or I imagine, did. In fact, most of the devout GameCubers have those special metal containment devices for transporting their cubes in. They are primarily used to transfer deadly weapons-grade plutonium to terrorists these days, and I feel they were a bit much for such a diminutive console. This is another in the "Generation NOW!" console concept of "multicolor means more happy", and it is nice to have the option, but I don't regard a system any more highly because of that. The system achieved what it set out to do quite nicely...unless its mission was to be the number one system; if that was their ambition, then never mind that last sentence.


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