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Game Expectancy
Splatterhouse: When Will Rick Taylor Die?
By Cyril Lachel     |   Posted on February 06, 2012   |   Episode 8 (Show Archive)  

   

Rick Taylor (in Splatterhouse)!
Have you ever wondered how old your favorite video game character will be when they die? Defunct Games puts that question to the test. By studying the lives of gaming's biggest stars, we are able to accurately predict when they'll croak.

(Note: All characters start at 79 years old, the national average for life expectancy.)

NAME: Rick Taylor

BORN: February 24, 1985

GAMOGRAPHY: Rick Taylor has starred in all five Splatterhouse games. It all started with the Splatterhouse arcade game (later ported to the TurboGrafx-16), then Splatterhouse 2 and 3 on the Sega Genesis. He can also be seen in Splatterhouse: Wanpaku Graffiti (Famicom) and the 2010 reboot for the Xbox 360 and PlayStation 3.

BIOGRAPHY: Like most 23 year old graduates, Rick will do anything for his girlfriend. In the case of Splatterhouse, that means getting stuck in the middle of nowhere while trying to track down a maniacal parapsychologist. Before long Jennifer is kidnapped and Rick is forced to wear the Terror Mask. Over the course of three 16-bit games, Rick battles evil to rid himself of the mask and save his loved ones.



MARRIED CAUCASIAN MALE

Ricky Taylor is a white male (-2)
who eventually marries the girl
he almost got killed in that
haunted mansion incident (+3).
Adjustment: +1


RICK THE FATHER

In the third game it is revealed that
Rick and Jennifer have a newborn baby.
This gives Rick something to live
for and love unconditionally.
Adjustment: +3


CURSED BY THE TERROR MASK

After getting into a near fatal accident,
Rick discovers the Terror Mask. He is
now a conduit to the other side. That
can't be good for his heath!
Adjustment: -40


LACKS FEAR

The Terror Mask removes all of Rick's
darkest fears, making him a courageous
killing machine. But fear is the
thing that keeps you safe. Gulp.
Adjustment: -2


IS GOOD WITH WEAPONS

After battling the evils of hell in
five games, Rick knows a thing or two
about using a meat cleaver to
cut off zombie heads.
Adjustment: +3


COLLEGE EDUCATED

Before finding himself stranded in a
haunted mansion, Rick graduated from
college. That will help, assuming
he can escape certain death.
Adjustment: +1


HAUNTED BY IMAGINARY DEMONS

In his short life he's had to deal with
the kidnapping of his son, multiple attempts
on Jennifer's life and an undiagnosed bout
with post-traumatic stress disorder!
Adjustment: -5


HAUNTED BY REAL DEMONS

Forget the PTSD, Rick has to worry
about the zombies, hell hounds, sea
monsters, haunted dolls and vampires
constantly after his family.
Adjustment: -13


FREED OF THE TERROR MASK

It took three games for Rick to finally
break the Terror Mask curse ... or so he
thinks. The problem with curses
is they never play fair.
Adjustment: +5


IS PART OF A HORROR TRILOGY

If Scream 3 taught us anything, it's that
even the main character can die in a
trilogy. Based on popular horror fiction,
Rick's days are numbered!
Adjustment: -4


Life Expectancy - 28 Years Old (1985 - 2013): In true horror movie fashion, Rick Taylor dies just when he thinks he has his life figured out. In this case, it's just after he smashes the cursed mask once and for all and plans for his family's future. After battling hellish demons saving his beautiful bride multiple times, there's no way for Rick to go on living. It wouldn't be a horror trilogy without hero brutally dying when he least expects it.

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