In the past 36 episodes of Commercial Break we have had many good times making fun of video game companies and their terrible advertisements. We've looked at old NES games, current Xbox 360 titles and even a few ridiculous accessories, and I won't lie to you, I've had a blast ripping these companies apart. But there's one type of advertising we have yet to address, something that probably deserves a whole show of its own. I'm of course talking about video game store advertisements, the local TV commercial equivalent of video game advertising. There is nothing quite as cheesy as looking at an advert that is clearly done at some guy's home on his personal computer.

Let me introduce you to Dragon Video, a company that used to advertise in old issues of Die Hard Game Fan. From what I can tell from this advert they are/were a North Carolina company that specialized in import games and the Neo Geo. As far as I'm concerned this is a good thing, the more companies that sell rare and import titles the better as far as I'm concerned. But if you're going to advertise your store in a major video game magazine perhaps you should save up some money and give it to somebody that actually knows how to make a convincing advertisement. I know I said that there's nothing cheesier than a commercial made at home, but apparently I'm wrong. There is something worse, a commercial made at home on an Intel 486!

The problem with this commercial is that I don't even know where to start; this advertisement is all over the place. Are they trying to tell us something by slashing the 3DO? And why is there blood (and eyeballs) in the green water? And who is that polygonal man with a Neo Geo headband? And why are they calling the cat? And who knew that palm trees were able to grow out in the middle of the ocean? You know what; this commercial has more questions than the entire season of Lost! The only problem is that I don't care what the answer is, because I have a hunch it's all artistic license from some computer geek stoned in his mother's basement.

FROM: America's Got Bad Advertising